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a community of independent thought on singledom, life, and love. | ||||
Books by QA Founder Sasha Cagen |
Quirkyalone: noun/adj. A person who enjoys being single (but is not opposed to being in a relationship) and generally prefers to be alone rather than dating for the sake of being in a couple. With unique traits and an optimistic spirit; a sensibility that transcends relationship status. See also quirkytogether, perkytogether, quirkyslut. More... 
QA on Countdown with Keith Olbermann, MSNBC QA in the News Praise for Quirkyalone from Barbara Ehrenreich, author of Nickel and Dimed: On (Not) Getting By in America: "Cagen is up to something that could be as important for women (and men) as The Feminine Mystique was years ago: We aren't just halves of couples; we are distinct individuals—as complete and potentially happy alone as we are with our families and lovers. Thank you, Sasha, for giving us this proud and thoughtful declaration of independence!" |
Can the unmarried change the outcome of the election?If you live in one of the 24 states that will be part of Super Tuesday tomorrow, I urge you to make your quirkyalone vote count! When politicians think about courting voters, they don't talk about us. They speak only about family values and working families. But families aren't always traditional. As the spot-on Alternatives to Marriage Project puts it: "Why does getting married determine your access to health care, your income taxes, your social security or pension? Because politicians don't think they work for singles, unmarried partners or "non-traditional" families. Why do they ignore and disrespect us? Because we let them off the hook when we don't vote!" This year, we're all voting! Here's a cool article from the San Francisco Chronicle on the power of the single vote: If you can vote tomorrow, I urge you to get out there and do it! In other news, stay tuned for International Quirkyalone Day party updates, and for a facelift on quirkyalone.net--coming soon, later this week! Yours in quirkyalone solidarity, International Quirkyalone Day Party Tips and SuppliesThe quirkyalone movement is a grassroots movement. Don't ask when IQD is coming to your town—bring it there yourself. If you're thinking about hosting your own Quirkyalone Day gathering, check out these party tips and supplies such as nametags and handouts. If you want to invite the larger QA community, post news about your event on the online community (click to the left). Email me the deets too so I can post them on the main site. Ten Ways to Celebrate IQDInternational Quirkyalone Day is rapidly approaching. Here are ten ways to celebrate. 1. Explore a new part of town—be a tourist in your own city. Mp5V7s pxsicmnjgxsr, [url=http://cndufvcakpxa.com/]cndufvcakpxa[/url], [link=http://atagnqfwdayf.com/]atagnqfwdayf[/link], http://tpdomjowsnbr.com/ Posted by doveqi at February 28, 2008 11:27 AM Sixth Annual Quirkyalone Day Party in San Francisco
The sixth annual International Quirkyalone Day is approaching. . . please put this party on your list! Come mingle with fellow quirkyalones and listmakers. This party is a celebration of romance, freedom and individuality AND my books: Quirkyalone: A Manifesto for Uncompromising Romantics and To-Do List: From Buying Milk to Finding a Soul Mate, What Our Lists Reveal About Us (just released). Thursday, February 14, 7 pm Bring a to-do list to see if it’s compatible with someone else’s. Miranda Culp of The Mirandaband will be lighting up torch songs. The after-party will continue next door at the Stray Bar (309 Cortland) at 9pm with hors doers and continued merry-making and mingling. About IQD: What is it? International Quirkyalone Day is a do-it-yourself celebration of romance, friendship, and independent spirit. It's a celebration of all kinds of love: romantic, platonic, familial, and yes, self-love. International Quirkyalone Day is not anti-Valentine's Day. It's NOT a pity party for single people. It's an alternative--a feel-good alternative to the marketing barrage of Valentine's Day and an antidote to the silicone version of love presented in shows such as The Bachelor. To check your quirkyalone status, take the quiz! To see some lists, check www.todolistblog.com. Comments (1)v7vvdT ftlofjvqbyxb, [url=http://wuphjcooxcob.com/]wuphjcooxcob[/url], [link=http://rxaznshcoequ.com/]rxaznshcoequ[/link], http://mboajzlmwznm.com/ Posted by crfwurzcldx at February 28, 2008 03:44 PM Come to a New Year's List SlamAre you full of optimism with plans for 2008? Or would you rather sit back and listen to what other people are resolving? Either way, the New Year's List Slam is for you. Come to a New Year's List Slam, a chance to read your own New Year's list out loud and hear other people's lists! A List Slam is like a poetry slam, but instead of poetry, people read lists. It's also a celebration of my new book To-Do List: From Buying Milk to Finding a Soul Mate, What Our Lists Reveal About Us. Recently featured on Talk of the Nation, To-Do List is collection of 100 lists and the stories behind them. It's a fascinating look at our obsession with lists, goals, and the notes we write to ourselves. Bring a list to read or share (New Year's Resolutions--or "intentions"-- encouraged!). New Year's List Slam I New Year's List Slam II Want to throw your own List Slam? Read these tips. Comments (2)asdf Posted by at January 5, 2008 10:39 AM Regarding, "monetize" quirkyalone in a cool way. Keep growing your google Adsense program, its one of your greatest income stream opportunities and highly profitable with the right work applied. It's all driven by "new and continuous content." Secondly, check other websites simular to yours, notice what companies and industries are advertising on their site(s). Approach the same company/industry types. As you know some will pay to have ads with links to their sites or you can negotiate pay by click, simular to the adsense concept/approach. The web is what industrial revolution was to the early 1900's. You have a unique concept with great opportunities for bringing people together in a common theme and a hugh following. You are well on your way to have a HIGHLY profitable site/community. Companies will see your site's market (quirkyaloner's) as a gold mine for their products or services. Capitalize on this. Excuse any typo's, it's 4AM and I am fading fast. Wayne Joseph Posted by Wayne at January 16, 2008 04:05 AM Quirkyalone (and SingleEdition) in the New York Times!There's a new singles website on the block, and it's not about dating. It's called SingleEdition and the New York Times ran a quick--and really interesting--profile on it and the market for advertising to singles today. The reporter interviewed me about what it takes to build an effective website that caters to singles (that's not purely solely focused on dating). Read all about it here. Thinking about SingleEdition's road ahead made me think about quirkyalone. If you have thoughts about how to "monetize" quirkyalone in a cool way let me know. I'm busy with promoting my new book To-Do List and other projects too but always think at the back of my mind there are so many possibilities for this site . . . if it had some more awesome people working on it. I am a list person, always so many things "to-do"! Email me at info at quirkyalone.net. . .
lets hire the admin to model the merchandise. I heard he was pretty cute. Posted by owen at January 1, 2008 01:00 PM How do you celebrate the holidays?There's a lot of propaganda about romance and coupledom at the holidays. The Christmas music on endless repeat in many retail establishments can be enough to do a single person in. The implication is. . . Christmas is all about cuddling up with that special someone, and if you're single, better luck next year! I've never believed that you need to be in a relationship in order to enjoy the holidays. (Maybe because I'm a social quirkyalone and generally enjoy holiday parties, egg nog, and oddly enough Christmas caroling. . . yes!). But I'm curious about how YOU feel about the holidays as a single person (or a quirkytogether--quirkyalone in a relationship). Do you survive them? Enjoy them? What words of advice do you have for other quirkyalones during the holidays? This entry kicks off the addition to comments to this blog, so please go ahead and comment below. Comments (9)comments rock, thank you so much. Posted by owen at January 1, 2008 09:11 AM Just found you after a friend sent me that NYT article--too bad it was more about marketing than finding community, which I think is the hardest challenge as a single, childless person. Almost all of my friends are now married with kids, but luckily they're all open to having me around. I've asked some to include me in family outings if they feel like it (most assumed I wouldn't want to). So I just spent Xmas and New Year's at dinner parties where I was the only single person--and didn't feel isolated or alone because I wasn't. Posted by seth at January 1, 2008 01:28 PM I am getting married this year, but was a qa for a long time. I am getting married because I have met a man I love and really enjoy being with, but being in a couple or getting married just to be married -that doesn't make sense to me. Posted by Raj at January 2, 2008 05:28 PM I found your website after reading the NYT article also. It was actually nice to hear about a website dedicated to NOT feeling like you're incomplete until you are in a relationship. I generally spend the holidays with family and friends. I will admit there are times when I look around enviously at the married couples and families, but I still can't bring myself to be with someone just to be with someone. This is the argument I seem to have with people more times than I should have to. I look forward to exploring the site! Thanks!!! Posted by Tina at January 4, 2008 04:17 PM Christmas is about lights, decorations, and yes - presents! They don't have to be expensive, just numerous. Christmas 2005 was a bummer for me. Everybody in my large family was part of a couple except for me that year. The worst part was when I had to watch the couples coo and shower each other with gifts while I sat there with my (one) present. I felt so left out, and none of them even noticed. It was the first time I felt I was no longer being treated as an equal in my family because I wasn't part of a couple. Dammit, I am an equal! My siblings are no better than me. But my mom sends the message very clearly. At every family holiday gathering, she assigned sleeping quarters by "rank." Married with children - best bedroom. Married without children - second bedroom. Girlfriend/boyfriend - last bedroom. Single (me) - on the floor in the den with my head - literally - next to the cat litter pan. Yuck. Maybe I should go to Cancun next Christmas. Posted by Barbara at January 7, 2008 08:41 PM I found it very interesting. Posted by Haralambos at February 21, 2008 01:52 AM Your site has very much liked me. I shall necessarily tell about him to the friends. Posted by Georges at February 24, 2008 07:23 PM Thanks for the interesting and informative site. That's definitely what I've been looking for. Posted by Lazaros at February 26, 2008 06:51 AM nRlVR4 wzkzsxbhxrbe, [url=http://wxdidqwsymwn.com/]wxdidqwsymwn[/url], [link=http://usidqdyjarfk.com/]usidqdyjarfk[/link], http://vzbdqqicjydr.com/ Posted by woaokig at February 28, 2008 03:44 PM Single at the HolidaysIt's December and the holiday party season is in full swing. Woe is me, I am single, how can I get through the month? Here are some ways you can actually enjoy the holidays. . . from an interview that I did with 210SA, a San Antonio weekly newspaper. Check them here. Quirky-Er Dating SitesEvery dating site has a psychographic as well as a demographic, which means that quirkyalones needs to find a quirky place to find a match. Match.com may dominate the market with the most users, but it's psychographic is decidedly . . . average. So it may be an uphill battle to look for love there. Plus, who really wants to give their money to Dr. Phil (he's branded as their Mind-Find-Bind expert, ick). That said, in lieu of, and who knows, in anticipation of, a dating site called quirkytogether.com (I do own the domain), here are a few more fun and inventive dating sites that I've noticed sprout up over the last few months. OkCupid isn't new but it seems to have undergone a redesign and is looking really great these days. There may not be as many people on the site as on others, but the service is free. Rather than the typical self-puffery of online dating profiles, most of the profiles are amusingly self-deprecating. There are more polyamorous types than you might expect to find--I wonder, if, like Orkut randomly wound up attracting Brazilians, OkCupid randomly became ground zero for polys. WooMe.com has gotten a lot of buzz. It aims to replicate the experience of speed dating online. Whether that's fun or bizarre or dehumanizing, I don't know. The site's UI (user interface) is fun. It seems to be aimed at the college crowd. Most weird and conceptually cool is OkCupid's new side project CrazyBlindDate. Sign up and get paired with random strangers for a single or double date. No endless emailing, no precise sense of what the person or people will look like (their photos are blurred). I'm assuming everyone meets in a public place. Not for the faint at heart, and probably not a huge success rate at meeting someone you'll want to see again, but if you truly believe in serendipity and have time to spare, and you're majorly adventurous, who knows? Could be fun, or at least, give you a good story to share with your friends. Finally, for QAs not so interested in dating at the moment, here's a new site SingleEdition, for singles "who know there's life beyond dating." One No Longer the Loneliest Number for Single TravelersFrom the New York Times: "Until recently, travel options for singles were largely limited to trips of the packaged-tour variety, with everyone thrown into one enormous group or just one step removed from a dating service. Now that’s beginning to change." Read more. Sacramento Single Ring PartySingle and ringless? No more. Singelringen, a Swedish company that manufactures aqua rings designed to telegraph a message of both availability and pride in one's single status, are now available. Singelringen is hosting a party to promote their rings and I and a few other single-minded authors will be part of the event. Here are the details, and a photo of me wearing my single ring. I have to say I just kind of like it on its own aesthetic terms. Jerusha Stewart, The Single Girl's Manifesta Sponsored by the makers of Singelringen, the Swedish ring for single men and women, proud to collaborate with leading authors around the world who celebrate Singlehood. Please join us with a toast to Singledom and to DV8, the fabulous Sacramento retailer celebrating the launch of their store in a great new location.
Berkeley List Slam Friday Nov. 16Listmakers unite at the world's second-ever List Slam this Friday night. A List Slam = a Poetry Slam, but instead of poetry, people read lists. Bring a list to read or share. Friday night doubles as the Berkeley release party for To-Do List: From Buying Milk to Finding a Soul Mate, What Our Lists Reveal About Us. I'll read a selection from the book and others will read their lists. Also on Friday: I'll be on ABC's (channel 7) The View from the Bay talk show at 3pm talking about to-do lists. Watch live online here. To-Do List Trailer!The To-Do List book comes out officially today! Buy it here, here, or here. Special Offer for Quirkyalones: Get a Signed Edition of My New BookMy new book To-Do List, a collection of 100 real, handwritten lists and the stories behind them, will be out in a week! I want to let you know I'm doing a cool promotion with Powell's, the coolest INDEPENDENT bookseller online, to offer signed copies of To-Do List. If you order from Powell's from now until November 19, you can get a SIGNED copy for virtually the same price as on Amazon. Not that I am opposed to Amazon, but it's nice to support the independent bookstore, and this way, you get a book with a very personal touch. Perfect for you or any of the listmakers in your life. Order a signed copy here. Because I love raffles. . . here's an extra bonus. Send the receipt for your Powell's purchase to todolistblog at gmail.com and you'll be entered into a raffle to win a limited-edition copy of To-Do List magazine, number three. To-Do List is where the quirkyalone and to-do list concepts got started. Just a reminder: The release party is Saturday, November 10, in San Francisco at Cafe Royale. Hope to see you there! Here's how happy your friends and family will be when you give them a copy. . .
To-Do List CelebrationsMy new book To-Do List: From Buying Milk to Finding a Soul Mate, What Our Lists Reveal About Us will be out Nov. 6, and November will be a month of list celebration. If you live in the Bay Area or might be swinging through, I hope you will join us and bring a list to share (and even read at the List Slam)! TO-DO LIST LAUNCH PARTY AND SLAM Bring a list to read as part of the list slam (think poetry slam but instead of poems we'll read lists). This will be a fun, low-pressure event, you'll just share your list and a bit about your state when you wrote it. Or tack up on the list shrine. There will be drinks, merriment, mingling, and signed copies of To-Do List: From Buying Milk to Finding a Soul Mate, What Our Lists Reveal About Us. EAST BAY LIST PARTY AND SLAM Mrs. Dalloway’s Hey, it will be a Friday night, what better to-do than share your to-do list with your fellow listmakers. Bring a list to read or share. About the book. . . To-Do List is a collection of 100 handwritten lists and the stories behind them. It's full color, which means you get to see the lists in all their crossed-out, tactile glory. Really, they're more than just to-do lists, they're an inside view into who we are and what we want, from the meaningful to the mundane. They're the bullet-point version of a diary. Check out some of the lists at: Stay tuned for additional future events, especially timed with the New Year (our national celebration of big-picture listmaking). My New Author's Site sashacagen.comThis month I finally fulfilled a resolution from January 2006: create a website just for me where I can write about any topic I want to and collect all my creative projects. I'm a mix of hopeful and skeptical about New Year's Resolutions, but it makes me happy to have finally crossed a big one off. Check it out: sashacagen.com National Unmarried and Single Americans Week (Sept 16-22)Yo! Per the Alternatives to Marriage Project, National Unmarried and Single Americans Week is coming up! They say: Now widely observed during the third full week of September (Sept. 16-22 in 2007), "USA Week" originated with the Buckeye Singles Council in Ohio in the 1980s. Unmarried and single people include all who have never married, are no longer married, or aren't able to marry legally. The Alternatives to Marriage Project mission is to end marital status discrimination and relieve and reduce the stigma against singles, unmarried partners and parents, and diverse families. To find out what you can do to celebrate and fight discrimination against the unmarried, head over to their website: www.unmarried.org. All These Lovely Single Ladies And No One . . .
Wanted the bouquet! This pic was taken at my cousin's wedding last weekend. I'm on the left in the orange dress (an old standby, I think I wore it to International Quirkyalone Day 2006 in SF). I cringed and resisted when the DJ called for all the single ladies to come up to catch the bouquet. (I've never been at a wedding where all the traditional rituals were observed and didn't want to be part of it now.) My aunts guilted me into going and then gradually all twelve or so of us dragged ourselves onto the dance floor. To my relief, most of the other women didn't seem to want the bouquet either. After the bride's first attempt sent the bouquet sailing (and stuck) in the ceiling rafters, the groom's grandmother caught it! Perfect. Was she a widow? I don't know, but better her than me! It was especially fun to watch the 20-something (male) catcher of the garter belt put it on her leg. (Wish I had that pic to share with you too.) My New Quirky Book
My new book To-Do List is due out November 6, 2007! But don't worry--you can pre-order it today. There are 100 list contributors--many of you contributed and I definitely think the love lists in the book have a quirkyalone sensibility. Ultimately, the book is about human quirks and how they show up on the page when we are in conversation with ourselves. To stay in touch and learn about To-Do List book events (there will be list slams, list shrines, and more), check todolistblog.com and sign up for the email updates list (in the right-hand sidebar). Special Invitation for Quirkyalones: StyleMob!Hey all, I want to let you know about a new project I have been working on and to invite you to be part of it. It's called StyleMob.com and it's a new web community for street fashion inspiration. Think MySpace, but the focus is on real people's style--what you wear and what you're seeing on the street. We're still in invite-only beta. I wanted to extend a special invitation to the quirkyalone community. I'd love to get your take on fashion as an early part of the site. (If you join we'll automatically be friends.) You can browse the site to get inspiration from other people's outfits, contribute your own looks for feedback. enter contests, and give and get style advice. You can also create your own team of personal stylists made up of Specialists you can find on StyleMob and friends whose style advice you respect. You can even earn stylepoints and win prizes! Let me know what you think . . . |
       photos of actual quirkyalones featured in the book |
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info@quirkyalone.net | to-do list magazine, p.o. box 40128, san francisco, ca 94140 |